BDSM 101: What You Need to Know About Kink

BDSM 101: What You Need to Know About Kink

BDSM stands for Bondage, Domination, Sadism and Masochism. Sounds intimidating, right? There’s no need to be hesitant about your kink inclinations! Many folks have been exposed to the BDSM lifestyle in recent years by the popular 50 Shades of Grey trilogy. The allure of dominance and submission, punishment, and pleasure is erotic, arousing, tantalizing, and intoxicating. The biggest problem that many people face is how to have a quality BDSM experience when they’re looking to have their first kinky encounter.

I’m not just a sex worker, but also a nationally acclaimed BDSM educator! Having presented at over 50 events across the country, I’ve made it my mission to make kinky fun accessible to the masses. Let me tell you, there is no better place to experience BDSM than with me here at the brothel! This introductory article serves to provide general information about BDSM. It should not be taken as a how-to guide, as it can take many years to learn the various skills required for each kind of kink.

Top, Bottom, or Switch?

Top: The person doing the action.
Bottom: The person receiving the action.
Switch: Someone who both gives and receives.

It’s important to know how you identify within the BDSM community, as this determines what your role will be during our time together. Are you looking to be a Dominant and take control? Would you rather have me be your Mistress, while I take charge? Both of these are possible with me. Personally, I identify as a Switch, and am comfortable with most fetish activities. The very first thing you should do when considering a BDSM encounter is to picture in your mind what role you see yourself in. This can also help to shape the fantasy- you can be a Slave, a Pet, a Master, a Dominant; the list goes on!

Safe Words

Green: All is good, keep going.
Yellow: Slow down the intensity/activity.
Red: Full Stop. All activity ceases.

It is absolutely vital for those experiencing BDSM for the first time to understand and use Safe Words. They are there to keep us both safe, regardless of which role we are fulfilling. Everybody is different, and as such we have different abilities to process sensations. Safe words allow us to communicate where we are safety wise without having to stop and ask. You can simply say ‘yellow’ or ‘red’ at any point! Communication is vital, and very important.

Negotiation
During a BDSM session with me at the ranch we will go over the various potential activities, safe words, any injuries you may have etc. This process is called a negotiation. We will determine who is fulfilling which role, what activities will take place, what toys will be used, and how long the session will last. I’ll also inquire as to any pre-existing injuries you may have, medical conditions that could affect your participation, etc. This is done before any activity takes place. I require that everyone discusses and agrees on everything that will take place prior to the session to ensure we will both be pleased with the results!

Aftercare
BDSM sessions can often be intense and evoke strong responses. I always include extra time for Aftercare during all BDSM parties. This is where we wind down, relax, have some water, and discuss what just happened. It gives everyone a chance to unwind and process the experience before resuming normal activities. If you feel hungry or thirsty, just ask and I’ll have food and water available! I take aftercare very seriously.

Ready to experience BDSM for yourself? There’s no time like today to start planning! Contact me directly via e-mail at [email protected] to schedule your session!

 

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3 Responses

  1. Been following your blog for a long time, especially love the insights into sex and intimacy from your perspective. It makes me feel more comfortable with who I am and gives me courage to explore my own sexuality a little step at a time. I'm really glad that it seems like you're starting to blog more actively again and I have to say I absolutely love the new website, very classy.
  2. A clear and concise introduction. BDSM is experienced on many levels of the body-mind-psyche. Going into it with an experienced guide would be an excellent idea.
  3. I'm thinking about including a bit in my next visit. Looking forward to seeing your lovely smile again.

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